In February when I posted about writing again I had good intentions to get back into my routine. But like the old saying, “the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry” (Robert Burns), my life has taken on a new twist and I find myself in the midst of a new storm.
Last November I went to my doctor for a pain in my left side that turned into months of doctor appointments and tests, with a break until March when more tests found other issues. I think I have had all scans known to mankind since this ordeal began. The ironic thing is my initial concern of the pain is gone. The problem (without going into much detail) is each test is inconclusive but then they find something new so more tests are ordered to get a clearer picture – and results again are inconclusive. I have felt like a human pincushion and Guinea pig!
I am thankful to God – so far all cancer tests (blood markers and MRI) show no signs of metastatic disease from my breast cancer. So the question remains – what is going on?
Six months later and they are still unsure.
I have them all stumped – I have no symptoms, no other pain (other than the pain in my side that went away), I feel pretty good other than another fight with a virus, and my appetite is normal. The peace of God has enveloped me as I wait and has given me super human strength for patience – if you know me you would know it is indeed God’s strength and not my own. Let’s just say when God was passing out patience I got tired of waiting in line and so went on to the next of God’s gifts!
So, here I sit in limbo.
Looking back during those months when I took my break, God was at work with preparing me for this season of waiting. So, instead of dread I feel an expectation of how God’s glory will be revealed.
God has reminded me I am at that age now when things will begin to fall apart, sort of like an old car, when one part goes they all go. I just need to go into the repair shop (hospital labs and doctor’s offices) for tune ups and repairs.
And, so, life goes on.
In between work, dr appointments and to do lists (yes I am still doing them!) I have plans to get back into my writing. I have even etched out a time frame to sit at my desk with a cup of tea, dogs at my feet and soft music playing as I type away all the stories and inspirational thoughts flowing through my mind during the day.
My best laid plans often go awry as reality sets in –
After working all day, there are the daily things that need done around the house and then time to unwind. Any writing gets put on the back burner as I jot down some thoughts for future posts. So you know, the dogs are on their sofas or chair – yes they have their own furniture and are gracious enough to allow us to sit with them on occasion – the only time they lay at our feet is when we are eating as they wait patiently for their treat.
We do not know what our future holds but we can face each new day with all the joys along with the uncertainties and trials knowing God is already there, preparing us for the unexpected and for helping us through our daily routines.
If your life’s journey is taking you on an unexpected path remember God is with you. God may be walking along side you or most likely carrying you but be encouraged – all of your needs are already set before God.
Our life may be full of uncertainties – but – God is always certain and sure.