A Promise Kept

Over 30 years ago my husband and I exchanged wedding vows to honor and to care of each other in sickness and health, for richer or poorer till death do us part.  Through the illness and death of my mother, during my pregnancies and the birth of our two children, through my own illness, during deployments; his own and our son’s, and most recently his own death, Tom, my DH (Dear Husband) has kept his promise to care for me.  With each passing day I find more and more ways he is taking care of us while we are apart.  And while the vows go on to say “till death do us part”, I know death will never part us.  Both of us believe the promise from Jesus that we will reside with Him in our heavenly home.  So while Tom is absent from us here, he is with us in our hearts ~ still taking care of us and still a huge part of our lives by the promise we made to each other on our wedding day.

Through the years we took care of each other.  He would bring home the “bacon” and I would strive to be the Proverbs 31 woman only to fail short many times.  And when I would fail my DH would pick me up and reassure me I made our home what it was.  I wanted to please him and build a good life for him and my children ~ in short I took care of him the way I knew how by cooking and cleaning and creating a comfortable home.  I supported him when his military career would take us state to state and at times keep us separated for months while he served his country.  In return I was blessed with a caring and compassionate husband and father who supported my work in many ministries and in my writing. 

God has also kept His promise to me to never leave me, by sending His Son Jesus Christ to carry me through life’s storms. When the grief was too much to endure and I was unable to pray, Jesus was with me; sending His servants  to pray for me when I could not. Jesus was with me holding me up when I was unable to hold myself up.  When my world came crashing down and the grief unbearable, Jesus was grieving alongside me, silent but comforting ~ quiet yet making His presence known. As I cried, I did not cry alone, Jesus wept alongside me.

My teaching leader from BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) spoke of death at the end of the year after we studied the book of Genesis. I can’t remember word for word but one thing remained with me.  She stated, “We each handle grief in our own way and one way we can begin our healing is by honoring those we love by continuing on doing what God has called us to do… Death is not an ending but a beginning of change – a hope” Death may have temporarily separated us and my grief will always remain with me, but the work we started together will go on.  As Tom had always kept his promise to take care of me, I will keep my promise to him to honor his life and how much he meant to me by moving forward ~ never giving up as I continue on with what God has called us to do.  

There will be many dark days ahead as I continue to struggle to rebuild my life but God has lit the way for me by sending His Son Jesus Christ as the light of the world. I will keep my promise that I made to God when I gave up my life to serve Him and I will keep my promise to Tom, made over 30 years ago when we recited our marriage vows.

1 Corinthians 13:4–8a
Love is patient, love is kind…. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails … (NIV)


About Patty B

My life centers around my faith in God and my family. www.specialmomentsinphotos.wordpress.com www.thoughtsfromanamericanwoman.wordpress.com
This entry was posted in Family Life, Home, Reflections and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

91 Responses to A Promise Kept

  1. russtowne says:

    Promises kept indeed. Thank you for this beautiful tribute to your DH, marriage, and faith.

  2. Auntie Em says:

    Oh Patty, what a beautiful glimpse of your heart! Thank you for sharing!

    • Patty B says:

      I can’t say thank you enough for what you all have meant to me these past few months.

      • Auntie Em says:

        I am so glad to hear you say that. I’m really examining my activities and want to do what God wants me to do. I was asking for direction about the blog– is it helping? Ministering? And it sounds like maybe it is. Thank you!

      • Patty B says:

        I for one can say it is ministering….you have a special way of encouraging and uplifting others.

  3. That is such a beautiful way to honor and remember your husband…. Diane

  4. Lori Lara says:

    Patty, I’m so moved by you. I’m absolutely bawling. This is the most beautiful tribute to vows I’ve ever read.

    My dad is making his way without my mom. He has that grief you so well described here, but he’s also starting to feel a newness and rebirthing between him and The Lord. If it hasn’t happened for you yet, it is on its way.

    You are taking your God given place in history with such a raw and faithful heart. God bless you in the morning, throughout the day, in the evening, and while you sleep. When the waves of grief wash over you, may you rest as you ride it out, knowing good things lie ahead and that you can welcome them without letting go of your precious DH’s hand.

    Love and prayers to you, sister. Keep writing.

  5. Dear Patty,
    I have been thinking about you, wondering how you were doing. You have written a very moving tribute to Tom. I am so glad you are finding some comfort through your faith as you deal with your grief. Sending you hugs and good thoughts.

  6. I read something this morning, and this beautiful post brought it to mind: “Oh, the love-tokens, the love-letters, the bracelets, the jewels that the saints are able to produce since they have been in the furnace of affliction!” Charles Spurgeon quoted this in his book, “The Saint and His Savior.” You have written a wonderful love letter to your husband and your Lord.

    • Patty B says:

      That was a beautiful quote. I never thought of it as a love letter to my husband, but I did write this through many long nights wanting to let him know how much I appreciate him still caring for us.

  7. jaggh53163 says:

    Patty – A beautiful tribute to your DH. You know that He is cradling you in His strong hands, and when things become unbearable, take a moment or two and just rest in those very capable hands. Only there will you find peace.

  8. A beautiful post from a beautiful heart. Thank you for sharing.

  9. Dearest Patty ~ you shine with your loving heart through your grief. What a beautiful testament to your faith, your loving husband and to yourself! I am so blessed that we connected. You are always in my prayers. Big, heartfelt hugs xo

  10. It’s good to hear from you again Patty. Have thought of you often these last weeks. Thanks for your brave and affirming post. Blessings Karen

  11. What beauty lies in your heart. Thank you for sharing this. Thank you for showing us that love, indeed, does not fail.

  12. lexiesnana says:

    I am moved by your words. Beautiful tribute to your man. Blessings.

  13. You are remarkable and I continue to think of you and to send you love x x

  14. Patty this is so beautifully moving. I’m sure DH is so proud of you and your commitment to continue the work you started together. How inspiring and courageous you are. Blessings to you sister.

  15. LubbyGirl says:

    This made me cry. Thank you for sharing your heart.

  16. margaret21 says:

    A very moving and touching post. Thank you for sharing such personal thoughts and feelings. You’ve been much in my thoughts over the last weeks, and it’s good to see you beginning to beginning to write once more.

  17. Terry says:

    I cried reading this, tears for your strength, tears for your lonely heart, and tears of joy as you never forgot God throughout this. love and hugs my friend

  18. Patty, I am so very sorry for your loss. He sounds like a wonderful man and I know you must miss him terribly. You are so correct, God will not leave you — not even for one second. You are surrounded by His love and protection and by all those who know you … even your blogger friends. You are in my prayers! Love and hugs to you.

    • Patty B says:

      thank you – I have found that cyber hugs are very good medicine! My blogger friends have been an inspiration to me and I have found comfort in everyone’s support. Thank you for your prayers and your hugs.

  19. What a lovely and loving post, Patty. You and Tom created a wonderful life together, and this is a tribute to both of you. Keep writing; the memories will uplift and uphold you. God bless.

    • Patty B says:

      Thank you – Tom always was my best encourager and although it is a struggle and I find it difficult at times to move forward, I feel a peace in knowing he would approve.

  20. Beautiful and from the heart. I am so very sorry for your loss. I love how you embrace each memory…sending prayers and hugs to you ♥ paula

  21. Sheryl says:

    What a thoughtful and beautiful tribute! I’ve been thinking about you these past few months, and feel certain that with God’s help you’ll get through the rough times as you rebuild your life.

    • Patty B says:

      Thank you Sheryl, it is with God that we are making it through, I know I would not be able to do alone. Not to mention all of you dear friends that God put in my life for such a time as this.

  22. Absolutely beautiful Patty. I felt your every word, and your hope, encouragement and love truly shine through in the midst of this challenging time. Thank you for being such an example of God’s unfailing love, and you and your family continue to be in my prayers.

    • Patty B says:

      thank you – everyone’s prayers mean so much to us. Each day we struggle to face another lonely day but God’s grace carries us through.

  23. Patty, this is such a beautiful tribute to both your husband, Tom, and to the love of our Lord.

    Gentle hugs ~ Wendy

  24. gpcox says:

    You sound strong, excellent. Know that we are here if you need a shoulder.

  25. As always, your words are touching. You were lucky to have such a long marriage and I wish it could have been even longer. You are in my thoughts. Hugs.

  26. utesmile says:

    This is beautiful writing , a wonderful tribute to your DH and showing your love for our Lord. I believe writing this was hard but also helping iwht the grieving and healing. It also shows you wonderful loving big heart. It is very emotional. You are a strong woman and you have Gods love and Tom’s love with you! Big hug! Ute

  27. I wish every young person could read this tribute and understand the truths and blessings of marriage.

  28. Patty: It is indeed good to see you again. I knew we’d see you when the time was right. This blog is a testimony of the gift of God’s love and your marriage to Tom.

  29. Denise Hisey says:

    Beautiful, Patty… He would be proud.

  30. Lori Lipsky says:

    What a beautiful, touching message of love, Patty. Such a sweet tribute.

  31. Mustang.Koji says:

    Patty… What beautiful writing. Absolutely heavenly if I may use that word… I know from afar that he IS with you each day. He lived his life grandly and although he is not there physically, he left his wonderful influence on you and all around you. He was a success at life, as your husband and friend while protecting us from greater threats… Tom is still here, Patty!!

  32. It is so hard to start over and rebuild our lives…but I know God is Faithful to his promises…keep the faith my friend.

  33. Dearest Patty, this post is absolutely wonderful. You are a shining example of His love. This post has touched me deeply, and helped me more than you know. This especially: “When my world came crashing down and the grief unbearable, Jesus was grieving alongside me, silent but comforting ~ quiet yet making His presence known. As I cried, I did not cry alone, Jesus wept alongside me.”
    Beautifully written. And timely for me. Your deep wisdom and faith helps illuminate the way.
    Warm hugs of gratitude, Gina

  34. Dilip says:

    May the Lord continue to give you all the courage and peace.

  35. Oh honey. I didn’t know. I’m sending you so much love.

  36. Patty, what a sweet, positive spirit you present to those who need a warm hug when times are tough.

    I realize many will ask, “Why did bad things happen to such a good person” such as yourself. I suspect God plans for you to win others to the Lord with your faithful, godly example throughout this tribulation. What a remarkable man Tom was and what a legacy. You are indeed shining forth as gold through his refection, winning others to Christ! I greatly admire your strength and know that God will bless you always, because you have already blessed me.

    • Patty B says:

      Thank you Ellie, I don’t think we will ever understand why God allows certain things to happen. But this we know – He Promises to always love us and be here for us and He has. God fills my soul with His words – I thank Him for using me to share them with you and others.

  37. JanBeek says:

    Thank you for your wonderful tribute to you DH, to marriage and the bond that carries us into eternity together. Others will find strength in your strength. I know I do. Thank you! 🙂

  38. It is true. Love is stronger than death.
    Thanks for sharing such a beautiful love story.

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